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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION THURSDAY, 26 NOVEMBER 2009
You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment".
It took you three days to reply "thanks".

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
  2. Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
  3. Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
  4. Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
  5. Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
  6. You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
  7. Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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