ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something.
It landed. Enjoy that. It's the last thing this week that will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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