ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English language.
Then they renamed it. The sentence survived.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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