ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Some meetings could have been an email.
You'll spend four years of your one life in them. Nobody took minutes.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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