ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English language.
Then they renamed it. The sentence survived.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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