ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- You manifested your dream job. The universe received the request, checked your CV and…
- Wildflowering means letting the relationship grow naturally, with no timeline. It has the growth…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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