ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone.
Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do Not Answer".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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