ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Dress for the job you want.
The job you have will see you in at nine, in a lanyard, until retirement or restructure. Bet on restructure.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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