ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 23 APRIL 2014
Your company will send flowers to your funeral.
They'll be charged to your department's budget.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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