ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The in-office lunch is optional.
The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is writing down who didn't come. Then who did, but looked replaceable.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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