ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Treat yourself, they said.
You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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