ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to something.
They haven't. They've committed to watching your stories within four seconds and replying to nothing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Underconsumption core is a beautiful aesthetic. It's what the last week of the month…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Make your money work for you. Yours quit in 2019. It works for your…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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