ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Everyone's bringing back the dog filter.
Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look on its own since March, and it doesn't come off when you close the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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