ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.
The printer has better job security.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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