ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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