ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every company now has an AI assistant.
It's the only member of staff nobody's asked to come in on Fridays, and the only one getting your job.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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