ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You said you're "so busy" this week.
Your screen time says eleven hours a day. Busy is one word for it. Scrolling is the other.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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