ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 20 MARCH 1959
You are exactly where you're meant to be.
That should frighten you more than it does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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