ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway.
Written down first, so the guilt has paperwork.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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