ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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