ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You manifested your dream job.
The universe received the request, checked your CV and moved you to spam.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch. Quiet budgeting is going anyway,…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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