ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "healing your inner child".
Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult that hasn't opened a letter since March.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- In three generations, nobody will remember your name. You don't know your great-grandmother's, so…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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