ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment.
The candles are outnumbering the years you've got left.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- You manifested your dream job. The universe received the request, checked your CV and…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Mistakes were made. Nobody made them. They just happened, like weather.
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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