ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Love yourself first.
Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- AI agrees with you more than any human ever has. That's not wisdom. That's…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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