ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have an eleven-step skincare routine.
Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is doing its best. It isn't a miracle worker.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch. Quiet budgeting is going anyway,…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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