ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 8 SEPTEMBER 1964
Some people run marathons.
You run late, and you still come last.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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