ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 25 NOVEMBER 1966
Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment.
The candles are outnumbering the years you've got left.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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