ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 3 JULY 1967
You're "so random".
You've told the same "so random" story at every party since 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- You can't take money with you when you go. Your direct debits, however, will…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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