ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- You started a podcast with your mate “for a laugh”. Episode 31 has nine…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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