ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending in y, right up until the all-hands where they mention you in the past tense.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Both sides declared victory. The only clear loser was your Tuesday evening.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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