ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "so random".
You've told the same "so random" story at every party since 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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