ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You bought the yoga mat.
The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible, more mindful and better liked.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- You started a podcast with your mate “for a laugh”. Episode 31 has nine…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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