ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Start the week strong.
Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a buffering icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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