ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your therapist said set boundaries.
You set one. Then texted them at 2 a.m. to explain it for forty minutes.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- You rage quit because the game was rigged. You were also just bad. Both…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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