ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 18 MARCH 1977
Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone.
Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do Not Answer".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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