ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 7 SEPTEMBER 1978
When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm.
It had such plans for your Thursday.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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