ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake.
The standing still was flawless. The getting up took a team, a run-up and a noise you'd never made before.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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