ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 5 SEPTEMBER 1980
Till death do us part.
Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified end date.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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