ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 3 MAY 1981
Inside every older person is a younger person.
The younger person is furious about the knees.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- Core collaboration days started as Tuesday. They now include Wednesday, Thursday, a Friday that's…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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