ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Too close to call” means nobody knows.
It is said by people paid a lot to know.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Strangers online have voted you "not wrong". The same strangers once voted to give…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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