ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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