ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Age is just a number.
So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than your salary.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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