ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
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