ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your banking app pauses slightly before opening.
It's deciding how to tell you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Every great company started in a garage. Yours will end there too. The car's…
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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