ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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