ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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