ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your therapist said set boundaries.
You set one. Then texted them at 2 a.m. to explain it for forty minutes.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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