ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life.
Someone will close them after the funeral. Unread.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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