ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- The in-office lunch is optional. The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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