ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The customer is always right.
The customer is also on hold, forever, which is exactly how the company likes it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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